the other night we were catching up on ray donovan; the last episode of season three closes with a song from a band i’d never heard of called “queens of the stone age.” maybe it was that i was tired. maybe it was that the song was so fitting for the story line.

and i could get into a very long post here about how in many ways this song really, somehow, deeply touched me, and how i needed to immediately, right then, learn the lyrics, and dissect them, line by line, make them my own. and how much they so perfectly matched the stitches of my past self and my present self.

but i think instead what i’d rather do is simply give you the lyrics this time. and a link to the video. though i will say this – the video is… strange. for me, the video 100% does not go with my own life, my own translations, my own trains of thought. so maybe listen to it, but read the lyrics.

and i think some of you will make it your own, too.

queens of the stone age – “the vampyre of time and memory”

i want god to come and take me home, ’cause i’m all alone in this crowd.
who are you to me? who am i supposed to be?
not exactly sure anymore where’s this going to?
can i follow through? or just follow you for a while?

does anyone ever get this right?
i feel no love…

ain’t no confusion here, it is as i feared. the illusion that you feel is real.
to be vulnerable is needed most of all.

if you intend to truly fall apart – you think the worst of all is far behind.
the vampyre of time and memories has died.

i survived!

i speak, i breathe, i’m incomplete, i’m alive – hooray!
you’re wrong again – ’cause i feel no love

does anyone ever get this right?
does anyone ever get this right?

i feel no love… i feel no love